A Story about …CBA days
Do you get them? What do you do? ?
For those of you not familiar with the term CBA stands for Can’t Be Arsed
We all have those days, even people who seem to regularly have all their ducks in a row! ????
Some signs of a CBA day looming:
? Drained after a bad nights sleep
? Feeling under the weather, not quite right
? Family being more challenging than normal
☑️ To Do list is too long and too challenging
??♀️ Everything you touch seems to go wrong
? Get up and go seems to have got up and gone
? Exercise is not appealing.
?♀️ Teetering on the edge feels more like clinging on by your fingertips!
This time of year can trigger more of those CBA moments than normal with the unpredictable weather, the darkness and dreariness.
It can all seem too much. The desire to bin out and just hunker down under a blanket with a plateful of biscuits and hide from the world can be very strong! Or is that just me? ??♀️
Here’s how I manage a big case of the CBA’s.
I give it a score out of 10. And then take action accordingly.
?1-5 out of 10 – A mild CBA DAY
Often a mindset change can change the course of the day. So planning and actioning a few tiny steps can get me back on track
? Drink some water
? Take a walk
? 10mins sat quietly with no distractions
?♀️ A chat with a (supportive) friend
? A hug
✍️ Writing down the crap in my head
??♀️ Some gentle stretching
? The ritual of making a proper cup of tea (or coffee)
? A nap
And then moving on to something small and not arduous that will give me the feeling of achieving something that day.
Like:
✅ An easy item ticked off the To Do list
?? Some exercise – something that is enjoyable and not too challenging
? Clear some clutter
Action is so much easier to take once you start taking it. And the tiny steps create momentum to the small steps that then make the larger steps more manageable ??
?6-9 out of 10 – A medium CBA Day
These are the times when the overwhelm seems overwhelming! When the tears are right there waiting and the thoughts tend toward the negative and small things going wrong lead to end of the world despair!
These are the times I treat myself to permission to change the plan for the day.
Some things I do
✋?Give myself permission to not achieve
?Write the angst onto paper and burn it
?♀️Recognise that I am not superwoman
⏱Take the morning/afternoon/day off all non essentials
? Choose to do something that is comforting and nurturing and enjoy it with no guilt
? Hunt for and celebrate all and any positives and silver linings I can think of
? Stay away from media/news/challenging tv
?Decide what I want the next minute/hour/day to look and feel like
?Take the tiny/small actions that will help that happen
??Celebrate each and every step
CBA days can feel overwhelming.
But we can still choose how we act
What causes your CBA days? And what actions do you take?
?10 out of 10 – A High CBA day
These days are the days when just getting out of bed is too challenging.
Often I find these days are the days when the essential non avoidable adulting needs to be done by someone else.
These are the days, when if we force the issue and keep trying to drive forward will lead a CBA moment extending over a longer time frame.
These are what I class as emergency self care days.
How I deal with those days?
?Explain in as self supporting way as possible to those around me what is going on and how I am choosing to nurture myself
⏭Delegate, rearrange, cancel my diary for that day.
? Listen to my body and mind and only do the things that don’t challenge me.
?? Remind myself that it’s ok to not be ok
? Take myself out of my head (normally with a good book) to break the thought cycle
?Aim to bring the 10/10 down by 1 so I can move on to the middle actions.