What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

The short answer?

A fighter pilot – aged 8 and female in the 70’s this was not even allowed! I was told I could be an air traffic control officer instead.  Same, same, right?!

By the time society had changed enough to let women be fighter pilots my eyesight was too bad.  Blooming typical!

I didn’t find my true purpose & passion until the age of 42 with The Southey Way!


The Long answer?

OK buckle up, I’m going to Top Gun this Story. Get a cuppa and settle in for the ride!

I figured it should be a good idea to start at The Beginning.

How did The Southey Way come about? Where did it all start?

I have to start with The Black Years. About 10 of them!

Without going into too much detail, I was not a happy bunny for a very long time.  Only I didn’t realise I wasn’t happy.  I just thought I was getting Life all wrong! Failing miserably at Life, the Universe and Everything.

I was staying at home raising my 2 young kids, supporting my husband (who was working a demanding job and working away a lot) and looking after our 1st spaniel. My sole purpose was to help them live their best lives possible. Everything I did, I did for them.  That was my job, and I was going to do it to the best of my ability.

So why was I so miserable? Why did I struggle to feel happy? Why was it so difficult to get out of bed each day? Why could I not leave the house on my own? Why did I eat & drink all the bad stuff? Why did the voice in my head beat me up so much? Why was I so invisible and insignificant?

Too many questions for my poor brain to cope with.

On the outside it would appear I had everything: Husband, lovely kids, crazy spaniel, nice house etc etc etc. All the things we are encouraged to be and do. And all around me people thought all was ok. I was an expert in not letting my misery or failure show.

But on the inside, I felt I’d lost myself, who I was as a person, as an individual.  I felt invisible.  I had no self-respect, self-worth, self-confidence and no voice.

It was a very self-destructive time.

Then I came to The Fork in The Road

By this point it was very clear to me that I couldn’t carry on as I had been.  Something would have to happen.  Either I took the one path that left me sliding down the slippery slope of doom and failure and pain.  Or I took the other path.  The one that went I knew not where but had a glint of sunshine peeking from around the corner.

Fortunately, I took the glinting path. And off I ventured, one baby step at a time. Quite literally!

I looked for help.  Someone that was separate from my life. Someone to support, help, advise and guide me on my way. I knew I didn’t want someone who was going to tell me what to do. I didn’t want another framework, blueprint, 5 step plan, rule to follow.  I just wanted someone to listen, not judge but make observations and support me when I made a decision for myself.

I looked hard but could not find that someone. So, I resolved to do it on my own, my way, whatever that took, however hard that would be.

And it was hard!

I started to move. Literally move. Setting myself the challenge to walk to the first lamp post every day, then the next and slowly going further and faster.  And my brain started to work again.  I started finding solutions, to think about what the next step forward would be. To reward myself for the lampposts reached.

Slowly, I got fitter physically and as I did, I got stronger mentally. Over the next 8 years I worked on myself.  I finally found people to help me: a personal trainer with a gentle approach, a coach with an encouraging and supportive manner, a business community of people going through their own life challenges.

I realised I will always have to do things my way, but I certainly don’t have to do it alone.

In May 2016, I had a moment. I was in a great place, personally.  I had found my voice, my self-confidence, and my self-worth. I finally respected myself.

I realised I was now in the position to BE the person I have been looking for all those years ago.

I was in the position to listen, support, help and guide people to find their own way through their own dark days. To help each individual find their own path with their own ray of sunshine. To help people find their way to thriving in their lives. To help each person make those baby steps to change with less pain, anxiety and stress than doing it on their own.

I had found my purpose in life.

I finally found my answer to the question “What do you want to be when you grow up” (Although I wouldn’t say I’ve grown up. I did that once and it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. But that’s another story!)


Within 24hours of this realisation I had set up The Southey Way.

So named because I walk my journey my way. I live my life The Southey Way and I help others take responsibility and control and live their lives their way.

What an awesome amazing way to thrive!


Until next time, Superstar


Sara x


Sara Southey from The Southey Way

Not just a personal trainer!


Health & Fitness for you, helping you thrive and not just survive

Body, mind and soul


Specialising in helping each individual person take control of their life and create their own unique sustainable health & wellbeing habits to thrive and not just survive


Fancy a 121? Book A Chat with… for your free 30min call with me

Want to DIY? Come on my TSW SOS: Take Control Workshop



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *